Mama Renren

Researcher, Anthropologist, futurist, mother, scifi enthusiast, technophile, tank half of a gamer couple

11 notes

If your father walks you down the aisle he might get shot through the heart by a loose pistol

My fucking crazy mother

when I told her that she wouldn’t be walking me down the aisle. 

(via mymotherisfuckingcrazy)

5 notes

I can't decide who's the crazy one any more

Mom:
I won't uninvite. I couldn't stand the shame. I will pay you ahead of time. I am so dismayed that it has become a money thing. Please leave me alone. You are so hurtful.
Me:
You never discussed any of these extra guests with me until after I already had all the envelopes printed. I asked you for a guest list months in advance and I asked you days before I ordered them if you could go ahead and give me your adresses. Everyone else managed to do it except for you. You procrastinate and then its my fault when I don't wait around for you?
Mom:
I'll bring this up one more time and that's it...if you would have done the taxes with me we would have $6000 to work with . You chose no to. It is true.
Me:
I'm so sick of hearing about this fraking taxes. look up the law you mad woman! I've been filing the FAFSA independently for years! I have my own dependents now! And I think i've proved so far that I really don't need your money for my wedding.
Mom:
Please stop disrestpecting me. No, you don't need me for anything. It was our money. I've always thought "our" You......"me" and "your"
Me:
Just stop. The taxes thing is illegal. You're not inviting your friends I don't know to my wedding. I'm not going to discuss this.
Mom:
You do not act as my daughter so please stop putting me in a role of responsibility [a/n: !?!?! wtf what responsability?] You ARE a bridezilla.

14 notes

My mother is now an ordained minister

mymotherisfuckingcrazy:

A few days ago I get a link from her that was where you can take a little class and pay to become a minister and I was thinking “Hey, my uncle and I are really close but his family isn’t represented in my family. Wouldn’t it be nice if he did the ceremony!”

Then I get this text:

"I am now an ordained minister!" from my  mother.

I think she thinks she’s going to be our officiant.

MY MOTHER THINKS SHE’S GOING TO BE OUR OFFICIANT! 

596 notes

jerksicaday:

Selina Meyer » 3x03 “Alicia”

"If someone takes a shit in your car, what are you gonna do? You’re gonna drop your trou’ and take a crap through the sunroof? I don’t think so, buddy."

(via aleriehightower)